After allowing the lies to go on as long as they have, let’s look at what’s really been happening. Shall we? Seems that Tiger “Blacanese” Woods has been caught stepping out on his woman. Nothing new. Since the story broke, we at Bootleggers Chronicles knew that the whole tree crash was a cover-up, but for what we were unsure. A fellow T.B.C.er has brought it to my attention that Woods was supposedly leaving his home at 2 AM. The question was why? The answer was soon made clear. His wife was after him.

She must has watched a few Tyler Perry/Blacxploitation films and went rouge on this Negro. Apparently a neighbor called in the 911 call but then the new question became – why? If he was a neighbor of the Woods family then would he not have known Tiger’s car? Then, another question followed, why did the Mrs. buss’ out the back windshield of the jeep? Tiger was in the front of the car driving was he not? Then if he was hurt, wouldn’t she have simply gone to the drivers side or, the side passenger’s window to get Tiger? Simply unlock the passenger’s door and then the driver’s door. No? Plus, plus this dude had no shoes on… Sooo, exactly what type of drive was he going for barefoot??

No ladies and gents. Mrs. Woods was going after Mr. Woods with his extremely expensive golf clubs that she snatched from the closet. Why not use a brick or rock or have the neighbor buss the window with an elbow or shoe? Hey, better yet, was Tiger unconscious? Could he not see you trying to open the door? I say he saw you and tried to speed off but the crash of glass from an expensive golf club shook him so bad that he hit a tree. WTF?! The same shit I say to women is why harm the vehicle? It did nothing to you. Tiger did the smart thing and attempted to escape before the Lionel Richie Ass Whoppin’ course began. “Hello, is it me you’re looking for?”

So once some questions were thrown out there, answers came to light. Yes, allegedly Tiger was unconscious. Here’s the breakdown of the neighbor’s 911 call. Oh, and another thing, why wouldn’t you’re neighbor simply say that “Tiger Woods” hit a tree? Doesn’t he know you live there? Just another question from a concerned T.B.Cer:

(P.S. redacted means stuff was removed so you’re not out of the woods yet Woods)

Caller: I have, this is, uh … (redacted) in the Isleworth subdivision. I need an ambulance immediately. I have someone down in front of my house. They hit a pole. I came out to see.

Dispatcher 1: Is it a car accident, sir?

(Dispatcher 1: Sir, is it a car accident? Hello? Sir? Hello?

Caller: Hello, yes.

Dispatcher 1: Is it a car accident, sir?

Caller: It’s a car accident, yes. I need, yes.

Dispatcher 1: Now are they trapped inside of the vehicle?

Caller: No, they’re laying on the ground now.

Dispatcher 1: OK, stay on the line for medical. Don’t hang up, OK? And it’s in front of your house, correct?

Caller: And get some water.

Dispatcher 1: OK, sir, medical is on the line sir, OK?

Dispatcher 2: Fire-rescue. What’s the address? (redacted)

Caller: Yes, Windermere, Florida, in the Isleworth subdivision.

Dispatcher 2: What happened? What’s wrong?

Caller: I have a neighbor, he hit the tree. And we came out here just to see what was going on. I see him and he’s laying down.

Dispatcher 2: There was an auto accident?

Caller: An auto accident, yes

Dispatcher 2: OK, is he outside or inside his car?

Dispatcher 2: Sir, your phone broke up. I heard inside. You there? Your phone broke up there. Can you repeat your phone number for me?

Dispatcher 2: Is he unconscious?

Caller: Yes.

Dispatcher 2: OK, are you able to tell if he’s breathing?

Caller: No, I can’t tell right now.

Dispatcher 2: OK. We do have help on the way. What color is his car, too?

Caller: It’s a black Escalade.

(Background, woman yelling): WHAT HAPPENED?

Dispatcher 2: Is anyone able to open the door?

Caller: We’re trying to figure out right now.

Dispatcher 1: Is he trapped inside of the vehicle or is he outside on the ground?

Caller: We’re just trying get the police here right now. We don’t know what happened. We’re figuring that out right now. I’m on the phone with the police right now.

Dispatcher 2: Your phone’s breaking up. Can you hear me though, sir?

Caller: Yes.

Dispatcher 2: While we have paramedics on the way, I’m just gonna stay on the phone with you. If you find out further just let me know. I’m going to stay on the phone, OK?

Caller: Hello.

Dispatcher 2: I’m here.

Caller: Yes.

Dispatcher 2: OK. We got paramedics on the way, but I’m going to stay on the phone in case you find out further.

Caller: OK, OK, thank you.

Dispatcher 1: Sir, is he on the ground or is he in the car?

Caller: Yes, he’s on the ground.

Dispatcher 2: Hello, you there still?

Caller: Yes, I’m still here.

Dispatcher 2: OK. All right. Your phone’s real staticky, but we’re still here.

Caller: OK.

Dispatcher 2: As soon as I know I’ll let you know how far away they are, too.

Caller: OK. OK.

Dispatcher 2: Are you with him right now?

Caller: Yes, I’m with him right now.

Dispatcher 2: OK, tell me how he’s breathing if you’re able.

Caller: Take it easy.

Dispatcher 2: You said he is breathing?

Dispatcher 1: Hello, sir, are you there?

Dispatcher 1: Hello?

Dispatcher 2: I heard a click …

Dispatcher 1: Yeah, I’m hearing that, too. Hello?

Dispatcher 2: Oh, his phone must have gone out of range. Looked like he was on a house phone so when he went to the exit he probably lost his connection. We do have help on the way, we should be there in just a couple of minutes.

Dispatcher 1: OK. We’re going, too.

Dispatcher 2: OK. Appreciate that. Thank you.

Dispatcher 1: You’re welcome.

Ummm, Tiger, one more question: Why go the Eddie Murphy route and hook up with a drag queen in-training? Damn, this should be a Sloppy Negro Alert!

Nervous audio of Tiger; but which “mistress” is he talking too?? The answer would be the broad from Tool Academy, Jaimee Grubb. She expects folks to believe that she was either getting twisted out by Woods or that he wanted to.

Thanks Us Weekly:

Here is another video to review:
CelebTV rundown

Now one can realize how desperate Grubb is. If there are more chicks out there, don’t be like Grubb. Why keep voicemails and text messages for 31 months? Seriously? You’ve clearly forgotten your roll as the jump-off. He jumped off and kept if moving, you should too.